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Showing posts from March, 2011

What do the Germans eat?

Since the day my Mom gave me a confirmed date of her trip to Germany (around the first days of January, I think), I began planning every little detail of her trip to Europe. She's coming along with my sister and my bati-cousin, Mariano, and they are two extra reasons to make an already amazing trip more fantastic. You might think I'm kidding, since you might be one of the readers who (a) does not know me, (b) does not know the new me, who plans every single minute of every single day, or (c) does not believe that I am actually as plan-phillic as I am making myself to be... well, to all of you, I am not kidding. I shall not attach it here (for the sake of my seeming to be a normal person, with sporadic unplanned events in my life... [I plan sporadic events, btw...]), but trust me when I tell you that my Excel table with 17 days of traveling around Europe is something to be proud of. I have chosen countries, cities, landmarks, parks, specific events and tours; I have planned vi

Give me my honorary deutsch Staatsangehörigkeit!

The most important part of adpating to a new culture is embracing it, and acting like the natives do. Like, if you live with gorillas, you should pick their skin too and eat their little lice. If you live in a nude community, you should walk about bare. Bare naked, that is. If you live in Germany, well, you have to do as the Germans do. Monkey see, monkey do. For starters, if you want to be German, you have to go outside at the smallest sign of a ray of sunshine. If you want to be German, if the temperature goes above 0°C (and there is the aforementioned sun), you have to go outside. If you want to be German, if there is the tiniest sign of baby flowers blooming (and the aforementioned sun and the aforementioned +0°C rule), you have to go outside. You see, being outside is very important to the Germans. It's very important because you can almost never go outside! According to the Gregorian Calendar (the calendar we westerners follow), Winter goes from December to February. Not

Success in Germany takes 8 months

I would have said 9, which is more accurate, but unfortantely no one can read "9 months" and not have "baby" thoughts. So, 8 it is. Success in Germany takes a while, in any case. And with that, I mean academic success. And also, by "success" I mean "ability to start studying in a Universiry" - I'm just implying that, not even having begun my German course, I have already finished my Ph.D. Aim for the sky, right? Ha! I finally took the test thingy. And I did good! I think so, at least. And someone told me it's all in the mind. I know they didn't mean this precisely, but "all" means all. And I think I did good, then I did. Because me and my mind say so. I get my results on Tuesday, I register the following Thursday, and the following Monday I begin my German course. Again. But this time, I will be a University Student. See how I capitalized both words? That's how awesome I will be: I will be a university student, with i

If it's not baroque...

I don't need fixin'. I'm allowed to complain, I'm allowed to feel uncomfortable, I'm allowed to not feel good. Also, I'm allowed to express my discomfort out loud. You're allowed to not like my whining, and you're allowed to whine about my whining. It's your prerrogative: my rights end where yours begin, and viceversa. What you're not allowed to do is fix me, especially when I don't need fixin'. Some people think they need to fix everything and everyone, and that they need to provide answers and solutions and fixin's. Dude, if I want your answer, I will ask you a question. It will be direct and straight forward. It will be impossible to miss. It will be something along the lines of, "What do you think I should do?" Then, only then, I want you to fix me. Otherwise, leave me alone. You might think that, if I don't want your answers, I should not ask you questions. Well, that's the thing: I'm not asking you

A Wonderful Combination

Being sick sucks. Wherever you are. Sick is no good. Especially if that "wherever" is away from your Mom. To be perfectly honest, unless your Mom has a medical degree and can prescribe antibiotics, Moms are not good for much while you are sick. They can't get you the good, make-you-better-stuff; they can't magically take your illness away; they can't cure you. But they can make you feel better. Because that's what a Mom does. They just make you feel better. So Honey was sick last week (which explains my being sick now) and I tried my best to make him better: I made freshly-squeezed lemonade and orange juice, I made chicken soup, I did everything I could for him, I kept him in bed all the time... and it was not until Monday, when he spoke to his Mom for over an hour, that he felt better. I've been sick for a couple of days now, but I spoke to my Mom today. According to my calculations, I should begin to feel  better anytime soon... Anytime... Anyt

Test DaF

Before going into the details of the test, which is what this post really is about, I want to say a word about the test names. What's the deal with test names? Is there an International Test-Naming Committee for international tests that need names, maybe called the InTeNC? Why must we have an IELTS or a TOEFL? Those are tests for non-English speakers, so why must they be given names that even native English speakers have trouble pronouncing? The Test DaF is not difficult to say, but silly. It makes me think of an incomplete Daffy Duck. Anyway. In  a couple of weeks I will be taking the Test DaF - exactly in 14 days. The Test DaF is a test that measures the test-takers' ability in Deutsch (German language) als Fremdsprache (as a foreign language). I'm kinda glad it's named after it's German initials; were it in English, it would be the Test GLaFL. Not the G-L-a-F-L, but the /gla-fl/, all said together, as if it were a word. Like TOEFL is a word: toe, as in a fi

"Sometimes I feel like a motherless child"

I took a singing class when I was in college. Gotta love American universities: you have to take some science, some math, some language, and some art. For the "some art" category, you can take photography, sculpting, acting, playing an instrument, singing... Well, at first I auditioned for a play, but got rejected because my accent was not Southern enough. In all honesty, it wasn't. It's never been. It never will--unless "Southern enough" suddenly means Southern like down in South America. In which case, given that Colombia is the first country in South America, is also not Southern enough (that would be Chile or Argentina, I guess). In any case, after being completely offended for a few hours, I read the whole play (not just the part I read at try-outs) and realized it was the story of three Southern sisters (GA girls) who had a very Southern  life. I understood then that it was impossible to "hire" a Latina (regardless of how accentless my Englis

What's up with this March thingy?

I guess one particular answer is that many couples were getting frisky during the summer months, and thus we have so many births this time of year. Seriously, only in my family: my mom, my sister, my uncle, two aunts, three cousins. But aside from the celebration of births, I also "celebrate" deaths, yet not as a happy thing. Just as a day to remind me how much I miss the people who are no longer with me. But then there are also the catholic holidays--gotta love us catholics--with our celebrations for a million saints. One in particular, whom we celebrate by drinking. Binge drinking. Extreme binge drinking. No wonder my sister has not spend a birthday sober for the past 5 years, since she and St. Patrick have their date in common. And then, since when did we start celebrating Carnival in March and not in February? Since when is Ash Wednesday in March and not in February? What is this overwhelming over-use of March? Also, March is supposed to be the beginning of Spring. Where

How to speak German - Intensivdeutschkurs in nur eine E-Mail!

I've been here for a while now, and more than trying to learn the language, I've been trying to learn how to SPEAK the language. You see, it's one thing to be able to read and listen in German, but it's another thing, a completely different thing, to be able to speak in German. There are certain hints that I've been able to catch up on, and I plan to share them with the world, so that I may be one of many who attempts to speak this verrückte language. Ready? Set? Go! First of all, in order to speak German and sound like a German, you need to lower your voice by like 3 tones. Try to pretend you're making fun of a male Opera or Mariachi singer -- yes, that's how low your voice has to sound. There are a few phrases that require an extreme lowering of your tone: (1) Ja , which means "yes", but when you really, really mean it, it sounds almost like a "yo"--not a rapper-like /yo-oo/, but more like a /yoh/ kinda thingy. (2) Es ist mir egal

Little Ray of Sunshine

I've been a little unfair to Germany and the Germans lately, and for that I publicly apologise. I tend to write only when I am trapped at home due to the inclement weather (well, ok, as Cata said , Wahrnehmung  is important, and gray, foggy and under 0°C is inclement to little Caribbean me). I tend to write only during these days and of course I tend to write with the mood that this type of days gets me into (OMG, please don't have Canuck read this post and accuse me forever of being the only English major in the world who finishes a sentence with a prepostion... which I technically didn't do because the sentence ends now, without a preposition). (Although, ending a sentence with "preposition" is just as bad as ending a sentence with a preposition, right?) The sun does shine--once in a while. And when it does, I go out. I make excuses to go walking, or shopping (without Honey's knowledge or consent, because we're supposed to be saving for my birthday...

How do you stop a recurring nightmare?

So, I've been having this recurring nightmare for about 10 months already. It doesn't come as often as it used to, but it comes often enough to be recurring. At first, it used to be night after night. Now it's more like once a week, or every two weeks. It's not always exactly the same, but the same situation happens and the same people are involved. Settings may vary, but the same thing ends up happening. The situation, although unlikely (I hope) is quite possible. What I mean to say is, my nightmare does not include demonic clowns coming from under my bed to kill me (actually, I've always thought there are crocodiles under my bed...), nor is it anything supernatural or including aliens happening. All of us involved are human, with human feelings and human actions. The first thing I do after I have these dreams is try to calm down (I wake up crying sometimes) and realize it is nothing more than a dream; everything within that dream (though likely) is impossible. I